The Year of the No Reindeer Flu
From the city of No in the south of Japan
Came a flu bug--but it didn’t cause the flu in one man,
Or one woman for that matter. No, the virus that year
Only caused flu symptoms in Santa’s reindeer.
Two weeks before Christmas that bug went on a roll
And soared up the coast straight to the North Pole.
The reindeer’s eyes watered and their noses, they blew
For this was the year of the No Reindeer Flu.
“Santa,” cried Mrs. Claus, “what are we to do?
All of our reindeer have come down with the flu.
Rudolph’s nose is all stuffy, it is not shining red,
He and the others are all sick in their beds.
They’re too ill to get up, and their fevers are high
They’re cold and their achy, why…they’ll never fly.
They can’t help you on Christmas Eve, not this sickly old group
They’ll be resting and drinking my hot chicken soup.
It’s a cinch you can’t pull that big sleigh by yourself.
So what will you do my once jolly old elf?”
Santa thought for a moment, then said, “Put out the word.
This year Santa’s looking for an entire new herd.”
“Tell all the world’s animals,” and Santa started to beam,
“Tomorrow we pick a new sleigh pulling team.
Tell them we need help on this one Christmas Day
Tell them the reindeer are sick...and to bring resumes.”
As the news spread all over the world on that day
Many animals came--you couldn’t keep them away.
When they heard Santa’s in trouble, they all caught a ride
To the North Pole they came from far and from wide.
There were tigers from Burma and llamas from Peru.
There were yaks from Nepal, and goats and cows too.
They came by the hundreds. They came every which way
Just for the chance to pull Santa’s sleigh.
Santa interviewed every animal who came
No matter how big, how little, how wild, how tame.
And after screening and searching the entire collection
Santa was ready to make his selection.
“The choice wasn’t easy. Everyone was so great.
Bus as you all know I can only pick eight.
So will the following animals please wander up here;
You’ll be subbing tonight for my ailing reindeer.
Salama from Africa I’m proud to declare
You’re one elephant I can’t wait to see fly through the air.
And Erik the moose from the land of Norway
I believe you have some experience pulling a sleigh.
Barakah, the polar bear from off in the distance
Tonight of all nights I could use your assistance.
And Jake from Australia, that’s right, the red kangaroo
Come on up, and, yes, bring your didgeridoo.
Isabella the rhea, now please don’t you cry
I just think it’s about time you learned how to fly.
Next, Buford the Buffalo from out on the plains
Thank you for coming, we can sure use your brains.
And Priscilla the penguin you already know how to fly
You soar under the ocean, now let’s try the sky.
Lu Si, the panda, from China--yes, you.
I‘ve alerted the elves to find some bamboo.
There you have it my friends! I think we are through.
I have made my selection of Santa’s new crew.
Shout out the good news from every rooftop and basement
Santa has found himself eight reindeer replacements.”
Then Santa turned to the crowd that had gathered around.
He raised up his hand and they quieted down.
As the cold of the North wind showed up on his cheeks.
He smiled, and nodded, then started to speak.
He thanked them for coming, he shook every hoof.
And when he was finished he jumped on the roof.
“Thank you again,” he said as it started to snow.
I will always be grateful--and now you must go.
For there isn’t much time, why I can’t believe
How can it already be Christmas Eve?
We’ve got eight animals to get ready and toys to pack too.
There’s so little time and there’s so much to do.”
Then remembering the animals assembled about
He didn’t want them to feel bad, to be sad or to pout.
So he winked at the elves and his beard he did stroke
Then he turned to the animals and once again spoke.
“To thank you for coming, the least we can do
Is to make your trip home fun and easy for you.”
Then the snow began sparkling as it fell from the sky
And all of the animals started to fly.
“Thank you my friends.” He said to the hovering pack.
To show my gratefulness you all may fly back.
You came from as far off as China and Rome.
The least I can do is to let you fly home.
The animals cheered and they laughed and they cried.
They soared and they dove and some learned how to glide.
The sky at the North Pole came alive on that day
As thousands of animals all flew away.
Everyone waved, watching the animals depart
Then the head elf, named Ava, turned with a start.
“Santa,” she said in a voice frightened and loud,
“But who’ll light the way through the fog and the clouds?”
“Rudolph’s so sick, and his nose light is low
Just then the sky around Santa’s head started to glow.
“Meet Sparky the firefly.” Santa said with a grin.
“And if his light’s not bright enough, he brought all of his kin.”
“Santa,” Ava asked as they both turned around
And looked at their team and the sleigh on the ground.
“Do you think they can do it? How will the sleigh run?
In the history of Christmas it has never been done.”
Santa thought for a moment then looked over his brood.
“It’s time to get ready, better get them some food.
And Ava, don’t worry, you have nothing to fear
I was once asked the same question of eight tiny reindeer.”
“We’ll put Erik and Salama at the front of the squad
Followed by Buford and Jake.” Santa said with a nod.
“Lu Si and Barakah will be next on the tether.
The last spots will be reserved for our two birds of a feather.
“We may not look normal; we may look bizarre
As we head off to the heavens and fly through the stars.
Why I’m not even sure the whole thing will fly
But I know that when night falls I can’t wait to try.
“So let’s get to work, there’s no time to lose,
These animals need to be ready to cruise.
There’s so much to do and the time’s getting tight.
I’ll meet you all back here at the first sign of night.”
The elves took the animals to the VIP stables
Where they ate and were pampered. Hey, they even had cable!
They were measured and brushed then dressed all in red.
They were readied for Santa and led to his sled.
They walked tall to their harnesses and as they were connected
They all stood at attention as Santa inspected...
He touched each animals face and he patted their heads,
“I can’t thank you enough,” was all that he said.
Then he entered his sleigh as the wind started to blow
And he lifted the reins and asked, “Are we ready to go?”
Each animal nodded without looking back
Santa ran through his checklist and rechecked his sack.
As the snow again sparkled down in the dark
Santa unlocked the break and nudged the sleigh out of park.
The sleigh started shaking as it moved up and down
And in no time at all was ten feet off the ground.
Then Santa remembered as he squinted to see
He’d brought along Sparky and his whole family.
As the fireflies flew around each animals head
“Light ‘em up Sparky!” Santa smiled and said.
In an instant the fireflies started to glow
And with the checklist complete they were ready to go.
For the first time in history on that Christmas Eve night
Santa’s sleigh was equipped with eight tiny headlights.
“Merry Christmas to all.” He yelled from his sleigh
As they soared to the stars and were well on their way.
“We’ll see you at first light with the dawn of the sun
When our sack is all empty and our mission is done.
So this Christmas Eve if you see high up in the sky
A moose or a penguin and a sleigh that can fly
With a polar bear, panda and a kangaroo too
It means all the reindeer have come down with the flu.
Just be thankful for animals. Oh yea and for St. Nick
Who will still bring Christmas to you...when the reindeer are sick.
THE END
